1、原來大家戀愛都是不公開的，我還以為大家都和我一樣是單身。
It turns out that everyone's love is not public. I thought everyone was single like me.
2、不要熬夜了，對手機不好。
Don't stay up late. It's bad for cell phones.
3、喜歡一個人太累了，所以我喜歡了十個。
It's too tired to like one person, so I like ten.
4、讓暴風雨來得更猛烈些吧，反正我是賣傘的。
Let the storm come harder. I sell umbrella anyway.
5、大家好，我是當地小有名氣的美女，具體多小呢，目前只有我知道。
Hello, everyone. I'm a little famous local beauty. How small is it? At present, only I know.
6、聽說有兩種人特別可愛，一種是健忘的，還有一種我忘了。
It's said that there are two kinds of people who are particularly lovely, one is forgetful, and the other is I forgot.
7、談戀愛嗎？談兩天，這周末我沒事。
Want to fall in love? Let's have a two-day relationship. I'm fine this weekend.
8、每次考試，監考老師都說請把與考試無關的東西放到講臺上的時候，我就想把我自己放到講臺上。
Every time the invigilator says "please put something irrelevant to the exam on the platform", I want to put myself on the platform.
9、問一下各位美女，假如有兩個男生追你，一個開法拉利，另一個沒有車，但是北京上海各有一套三居室，你打算什么時候從夢里醒來。
Ask the beauties, if there are two boys chasing you, one drives a Ferrari, the other doesn't have a car, but Beijing and Shanghai each have a three bedroom apartment. When do you plan to wake up from your dream.
10、在哪里跌倒，就在哪里燒烤。
Where you fall, barbecue there.
11、為什么不回我消息，真惡心，就因為我沒發？
Why don't you return my news? It's disgusting. Is it just because I didn't send it?
12、上班點外賣吃真的很不健康，建議大家不要上班。
It's really unhealthy to take out food at work. I suggest you don't go to work.
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